where did you go?

i used to have you everyday and then you went away. between the stress of the upcoming layoff and my insecurities getting the best of me, i lost you. i did something wrong somewhere. i missed you completely.

you are relaxing and you are sanity. you are a necessity in my life and now i cant find you. i need you back because im going insane without you. you are a gift from God and i've allowed you to slip away silently.

you are calmness and you are joy. you are my favorite attribute of God so what happened? how did i let you leave me? this storm is just getting bigger and bigger and my flesh cannot see the end of it.

i need you right now more than ever. i know you wont come back unless i get back in the Secret Place. so that's were i am to go because every time i open the mailbox to a new bill i think about what will happen when my income is gone. every time i need to go somewhere and i am without transportation, frustration starts to set in. im struggling with wondering if i am being selfish or its just the hormones.

i always had you, especially in any financial aspect. im not questioning "if" it will be taken care of but for some reason my mind keeps going back to "how" but i don't care how because You know how and thats all that matters.

i look forward to finding you again. you are like a best friend. you are wonderful and i will get you back... very very soon. who are you? you are Peace!